Volume 13, Number 10 |
by Joseph George Robbie
International Marriage Series #1
Well, now the cat's out of the bag, or did you already know? A large percentage of internationally experienced English teachers find their future brides sitting before them during vocabulary review. I did, and there this story begins.
Off in the distant land of hula and monstrous Northshore bone crushers, we fell in love. The juicy details of courtship and proposal I'll leave for another time, for this tale proceeds in the land of the rising sun.
"You live where?" "Tsuchiura, in Ibaraki." What was I letting myself in for?
To test the waters, I flew in for a two-week visit over Christmas and New Year's Eve.
Rika showed off the landscape to me, and showed me off to others. Now the day had come to meet her mother. As, well-dressed and spiffy as I get, I entered the cozy family friend restaurant, I saw her sitting straight and looking serious in the back corner of the room. She had come with support -- her sister with spouse sat adjacent.
Inwardly shaking, outwardly calm, obviously sweating, I seated myself across from the matriarch, Rika by my side. To drink or not to drink? When they encouraged me, I was thinking - "trap". Yet, I ordered a draft beer as the sister had one before her and offered a wink.
It went well. The mother was a delight. Little interrogation, much smiling. I had passed the audition. But something was missing -- oh yeah, the father.
He refused to meet me. There was some issue relating to loyalty to his daughter's ex-beau and family. This isolation was to last two years. So be it then, nothing could be done. I wrote him off.
A few days after Christmas, Rika suggested, "Let's go into Tokyo and find out about marriage." Wearing comfortable jeans and a red sweater, I entered behind her the flourescent, cubicle filled, massive world of a Japanese government office. We waited, filled out some papers, showed a passport, paid some money and got on a crosstown train.
At the American embassy, security was tight due to the action in the Balkans.
Filled out some papers, showed a passport, paid some money, and raised my right hand.
"Do you swear that you are currently unmarried?" "I do." Back on the train.
A return to cubicle-land a half-hour before closing time. Problem. Rika's father had given the wrong social security number to her over the phone. Accident? I suspected otherwise. Yet the crack staff had managed to resolve the crisis as we waited beyond scheduled working hours. A bit more red tape, then the helpful matron handed us a certificate attesting to our, now legal, bond.
A quick photo in front of her desk, and we were back on the street and married. It slowly began to sink in. It was truth. I'd left bed that morning single, scarcely imagining I'd return that same evening massively committed. No blood tests, no waiting period, no ceremony, - no return.
On the bustling curbside just out the door, emotion hormones coursing through my veins, I elegantly swept my new bride into my yearning arms, made an appropriate remark regarding the joy of our status, and bent to kiss her, to seal our happy union. Shockingly, she turned away, rejecting my public show of affection. I felt foolish. I felt anger. Our first fight ensued. What a start!!!
Trying to get over it, we found a German style beer hall and celebrated with sausage, sourkraut, potatoes and beer, of course. Then it was on to Roppongi, a happening district of Tokyo. Failing to find the pub where I had once played harmonica on Thursday nights, we settled for a small bar with a similar feel. Ironically, on my wedding night, I saw for the first time the movie, "Titanic", which was playing on the bar TV. You can't ignore an omen like that.
And so it came to pass, that I tidied up my affairs in Alohaland, sold the car, rented a large storage space, and moved, for better or for worse, in sickness and in health, etc., to Sushiland. For the first three weeks, I was timid, and depended completely upon Rika to help me function amid the unfamiliar surroundings and language. Thus, the fateful day arrived.
I had to get out on my own. Rika, a nurse, had night duty. I was going stir crazy. I had mentioned earlier the possibility of my visiting the where-I-met-her-mother-family-friends'-owned bar, hereafter referred to as "Country". So off I went, having more than a totally vague mental picture of the place.
Down "Soapland" street where the, then yet unfamiliar, pimps generally ignored me, to the train station, the center of most Japanese being. I knew the place was on the other side of the tracks, literally. So, I resolved to circumnavigate them. Mistake. An hour and a half later, I was hopelessly lost. What to do?
Ahead I saw a convenience store - how convenient! Inside, the counter girl couldn't comprehend in the least as I displayed the lighter with the word "Country" clearly visible, with a telephone number yet. An apparent salary worker approached in the midst of the miscommunication and asked, "May I help you?"
"Yes, yes, please do." The situation was explained, a call was made, directions were given, and I was on my way. The guy was a lifesaver.
As it happens, the way to the other side of the tracks is THROUGH the station ... who'd-a-thunk? So through I went, then all was ease.
Upon entering, I was spent, after two hours hiking my way along the paths less taken. Dazed, confused, I ordered a whiskey and a beer, both of which vanished, prompting another round. The house master let on that Rika had called, and was in distress after being informed of my plight.
Duty bound, I called her at work. Where had I been? - Lost. Was I OK? - Yes.
Why was I so stupid? - Birth defect. Unfortunately, she had alarmed the in-laws. "Mom" was currently cruising the streets in search. This, I didn't need. I'm a man. The things I'd been through, how could she think I'd be in harm's way by failing to find a sought pub directly? Embarrassing...yet worse was to come.
Following another round, the bar phone rang. For me. Rika informing me that her mother and younger sister, Shoko, were on their way to Country. Sure enough, they soon arrived.
Grave concern. Horrid musings. All for naught. Indeed, I had made it from the apartment to the pub without major incident. All was well - don't worry.
Another round, then the bombshell...
Otoosan, the father-in-law, wanted to meet me. Now
I'm thinking, "I don't think so", but to no avail. He was waiting. Now. A survey of my condition: extremely underdressed, drunk, exhausted, peeved at Rika, and with a hole in my sock.
No minor concern, that. Putting on my clothes for the eventful excursion, I couldn't overlook a big, big-toe hole in my left sock. "What the heck, I'll wear them one last time tonight as I don't plan on removing my shoes", I reasoned.
I'm a pro-choice kind of guy, but felt I had none here. So, we arrived. Amid the din of aggressive barking, a throbbing headache, and a feeling of impending doom, I remembered my culture studies. I had read up on Japanese culture before flying off. I removed my shoes and placed them facing outward, I bowed deeply upon entry, I assumed the formal sitting position, legs under, feet to the back, like praying. This served well to hide my holely sock.
The doggie din continued unabated. In a wonderful ice-breaker, the father-in-law shouted in English, "Shut up!!!" And they did. Did I want a whiskey? Thin, conservative, stern, he looked like the president of a prefectural fraternal business organization, which he is.
Awkward though it was at first, I actually scored some points by being a whiskey drinker and tobacco smoker. The old guy felt an ally in me. Things loosened up a bit. However, I was getting to be at a loss for words, since I only knew seven. Maintaining an acceptable outward composure, my mind raced - what to talk about? It was too early to leave. Then it hit me - childhood photos! Brilliant, eh?
Yeah, that was the hit idea. Saw Rika as a toddler, tot, terrible threes, all the way up to "developed" teen. An hour passed. I had to go, you know, to the "bath" room.
Shuffling my feet like a chorus girl, I did my utmost to HIDE THE HOLE in my sock as I passed by the elders. Found the room, found the switch, and soon returned, doing a similar three-step.
Okay. I had done my best under the circumstances. After all, I hadn't been ready for that scene in the least. It was 10:30. Time to quit while ahead.
Pleading weariness, I thanked all, especially Pop, for the hospitality. The ride home was like watching "60 Minutes" at half speed. Chit-chat with mother and sister-in-law; internal bleeding of confidence and ego in general.
Well, that's the story, in essence. I finally met, and was well-received by my father-in-law. We had broken the ice, and now there was warmth.
As a bit of an epilogue, about a week later, Rika returned from an afternoon visit to her folks. She had brought a present for me from her father. What was it? Whiskey? Cigarettes? I clawed at the wrapping, and soon revealed - ten pairs of new socks!!!
The End
Under the present law, one must get a reentry permit to leave and then return to Japan on a single visa. Such permits are valid for only one year, and thus foreigners on visas that are valid for longer than one year often have to make a special trip to an immigration office just to get a reentry permit to travel outside of Japan.
This is about to change as a new law goes into effect next Feb. 18 that will allow one to purchase a multiple reentry permit for the entire length of one's visa, up to three years (which presently is the longest visa issued). Thus, it will be possible to get a reentry permit at the same time one gets or renews a visa that will run concurrent with the visa for its entire period of validity. This should result in a decrease in income for JR and the toll roads and concurrent increase in the happiness of long term foreigners as they will not have to make otherwise useless trips to Tokyo or Hitachi.
The other changes in the law are hopefully not something that would concern readers of the Alien Times, as illegal entry into Japan will officially become a criminal offense subject to the full punishment of the law regardless of how long a period is involved.
Likewise, those who are deported from Japan after next Feb. 18 due to illegal entry or even illegally overstaying their visas will not be able to enter Japan for a period of 5 years (instead of the present 1 year).
THUD PRODUCTION presents THE TSUKUBA INTERNATIONAL DRAMA FESTIVAL featuring Edgar Davis, American actor and playwright in "Island of Mirrors" and "Sundiata". Also appearing will be actors, playwrights and stories from various countries.
November 13 and 14: Folktale Night (1000yen)
November 20 and 21: Feature Presentation (1500yen)
November 27 and 28: A Night of Short Plays (1000yen)
Special Festival pass (2500yen). All performances start at 7:30 PM at Frontier Bar. Amakubo-cho 1-15-15 (1F) Tsukuba-shi
For more information or festival passes contact Victor Heese at: tel/fax: (0298) 59-1327 e-mail: sn7v-hs@asahi-net.or.jp; http://www.ne.jp/asahi/tsukuba/dramafestival
Even though this is the November issue, we need to include information on holiday events coming up in early December. More details of the Christmas/New Year's holiday events will, of course, appear in the December issue, but to help in your holiday planning, some of the early events are included here.
Messiah Concerts
The Tsukuba Classical Music Choir will be presenting their annual concert on Sat. Nov. 27 in Nova Hall, and this time, they have chosen Handel's "Messiah". The program begins at 5 pm and is expected to last about 3 hours, as the entire piece will be presented. This is a highly trained choir that has been in existence for many years. Tickets are ´1000 (´800 in advance).
Another opportunity to hear the more well-known sections of the Messiah will be on the next day, Sunday, Nov. 28 at the Tsuchiura Megumi Church starting from 7 pm. This is an annual affair, and they do a really top-notch presentation (plus it's free!) There will also a special Christmas concert on Dec. 5 at 5 pm featuring Tomoe Sawa, and award-winning pianist and singer. This is also a free event. Tel. 22-2244
Christmas Lights
The Tsukuba Christian Center/YMCA building and surrounding trees, etc. are decorated during the month of December with thousands of lights and other Christmasy things. For those away from home and who would like a touch of Christmas, there will be a traditional turkey/pot luck dinner at 6 pm on Saturday, Dec. 11. If you would like to attend, please call Tim at 55-1907.
Shimin Christmas
The YMCA "Shimin (Citizen's) Christmas" will be held in Nova Hall on Tuesday, Dec. 7 from 7 pm. Admission is free, and a joint choir from numerous area churches, a handbell choir, and the talented international duo of Abraham and Sayuri Kist-Okazaki will present a number of "Christmasy" musical numbers.
Normally operating only during daylight hours, the ropeway (cable car) going to the top of Mt. Tsukuba will be offering night runs on three evenings this month. The first is on Sat., Nov. 13, followed by a Leonid Meteor Shower special on Thursday, Nov. 18 and another Saturday night special on Nov. 27. The operating times for these specials are from 5 to 9 pm and cost 1000 yen for the round trip from the parking lot at Tsutsujigaoka to the top. In the event of rain or high winds, the runs will be cancelled. The 1296 meter long ropeway takes 6 minutes to transverse and it will leave the station at 15 minute intervals.
To get there, you can approach it in two ways. The cheapest way is to drive up past the Mt. Tsukuba Shrine until you reach the traffic light at the crest. Turn left and proceed up the toll road (400 yen collected on the way back down) to the parking lot, the highest place you can drive to on the mountain. The other way is to go along the skyline drive (also a toll road) running along the ridge of mountains between the Mt. Tsukuba itself and Tsuchiura. This road runs right into the road leading up to the Tsutsujigaoka parking lot. After 9 pm on these evenings, the tolls will not be collected and you can use them free.
In addition to the regular national holidays, prefectures have begun having their own special holiday. For a number of years, now, Ibaraki schools and local government offices have taken the day off on November 13. For the private sector, however, it is generally business as usual.
One popular event held on this day is a special day at Tokyo Disneyland for residents of Ibaraki. If you buy your tickets locally (at train stations, travel agents and even Hot Spar markets), the Y4800 regular passbook ticket is reduced to Y3700 (Y2800 for children). If you can afford the time off, it's a great time to go. Be forewarned, however, that it tends to be very crowded, and so you can't expect to get on many rides. The "Fantillusion" show and other features of the park, however, are worth it even if you don't get into many rides.
Amazing displays of chrysanthemum bushes bent and formed into fantastic displays of flowers can be seen through Nov. 23 at the Kasama Chrysanthemum Festival. This year's display features 15 scenes from the Edo period, done up something like the floats of the Rose Parade in Pasadena, California - except these aren't on wheels or nearly as big, of course. And whereas the Rose Parade floats consist of flower petals, seeds, etc. pasted on, these flower covered scenes are accomplished with the flowers still intact on the bushes! In addition to these scenes, there are plenty of other beautiful displays of chrysanthemums, with judges awarding prizes for the best, biggest and most beautiful ones.
Kasama is located about an hour's drive north of Tsukuba and is well worth the trip anytime of the year. Famous for its pottery, you can enjoy the pottery theme park just to the east of Kasama while you are there. The best way to go by car is to go over the mountain ridge to Yasato, along what is called the "Fruit Line" Road, running along the east side of the ridge of mountains just north of Mount Tsukuba. You'll come to another mountain pass to go over on what has now become route 42, which drops down into Kasama. That road deadends just after crossing the railroad tracks just to the east of Kasama Station. Turn right and go a few hundred meters to the end of that road. Turning to the right and proceeding east for a kilometer or so will bring you to the "Geijutsu no Mori" Pottery Park (on the left), while turning to the left and proceeding north for about 1km will take you to the park (on the right) where the chrysanthemums are.
Local Displays
If going to Kasama is a bit far, you can find interesting displays at several places in the Tsukuba area. The Mt. Tsukuba Shrine has always had some very nice chrysanthemum displays during November, and in past years, local flower enthusiasts have shown their works of floral art at Matsumi Park, near the city hall in Yatabe and other such locations.
Tsukuba Area International Researchers Association, In Co-operation with Techno-Growth House, Presents Science and Technology Seminar
Dr. Yeruham Frank Leavitt: "Why Asian Bioethics are still needed"
Dr. Masaaki Yamada: "Japanese immigrant agroforestry in the Brazilian amazon: A case study of sustainable rural development in the tropics"
Date: Tuesday, 9 November 1999, 19:00~21:30
Place: Techno-Growth House, Sakura-Kan
The Agency for Industrial Science & Technology, MITI
1-1-4 Higashi, Tsukuba-shi
Tel: 0298-53-0806 (Mon ~ Fri 9:00~17:00)
For more information please visit:
http://WWW.geocities.com /CollegePark/Bookstore/9878/
Map: http://www.aist.go.jp/TGHhomepage/Access/aistmap.html)
Techno-Growth House: http://www.aist.go.jp/TGHhomepage/
The Professional Japanese Teachers Association Tsukuba will start Japanese classes, activities. We also have teachers available to provide lessons at institutes and companies. We are qualified and experienced teachers, who are teaching for institutes, companies, government official programs,etc.
1. Japanese language speech club.
The speech club is open to intermediate and advanced students of Japanese. The club offers opportunities to practice short casual speeches or performances in Japanese.(e.g.songs, plays) The 5th speech session will be hold on Thursday Dec.9th at 8:15-9:30.
Fee: 300 yen (including tea and snacks)/each session.
Place: Ninomiya public hall or a close place.
Joint: Bilingual toast masters club.
2. Sample Group lesson for quite high level students.
A Japanese teacher for Japanese people will hold a high level class for foreign students. Thursday morning 1h for 4 weeks.
Fee: material and facility fee only.
Place: Ninomiya public hall or a close place.
3. Monday Japanese class
6:20pm-7:40pm (80min.) beginners
7:50pm-9:10pm (80min.) intermediate
4. Tuesday Japanese class
advanced class for presentations. 8:40-9:30p.m.
5. Private lesson. Group lesson, at companies, institute, or other places.
Charge: class 2 - >classes 3, 4 and 5 - charge depends on class size, levels, place, time and so on.
Place: for 1-4 Ninomiya public hall or a close place.
For more information, please contact Ms. Suzuki tel /fax 0298-53-8201,
An English language interdenominational worship service is held once a month normally on the fourth Sunday of every month at 2 pm. at the Tsukuba Gakuen Church near Daiei. The November service is on November 28, and is followed by an informal fellowship time at the Tsukuba Christian Center next door. The Japanese language congregation meets every Sunday morning at 10:30, and the service is translated into English over headphones. There is also a Bible Study in English every Tuesday evening at 8:00 in the Christian Center. For more information or help with transportation, call Tim Boyle at 55-1907.
The Tsukuba Catholic Church has an English mass at 8:00 am every Sunday and the Japanese masses on Saturday night (6 pm) and Sunday morning (10 am) are accompanied by an summary of the message in English. There is even a Spanish mass on the 3rd Sundays at 3 pm. On the last Sunday of the month, there is a coffee social after the English mass. For information, call the church at 36-1723. The Tsuchiura Catholic Church offers an English mass on the last Sunday of each month at 3 pm (tel. 21-1501). There is also a Portuguese mass on the 3rd Saturday at 7 pm.
The Tsukuba Baptist Church offers an English language Bible study before the Japanese service every Sunday from 10 to 11 am. It is located in Inarimae just east of Nishi Odori on the street closest to the meteorological observation tower. Tel. 58-0655.
The Megumi Church in Tsuchiura (489-1 Kami Takatsu) also offers English translation of their 10:30 Japanese service over ear phones. An English Bible class is held every Sunday morning at 9:00. There is also an International Fellowship group that holds a monthly pot luck dinner usually on the third Saturday. For information on that, call Melissa Ishio at 38-1374. For more information, call the church at 22-2244 or e-mail LDN03144@niftyserve.or.jp (Also see their Tsuchiura Megumi Church Web Page at http://www.bekkoame.ne.jp/ro/tmc/index.html).
The Tokyo International Church, Tsukuba Branch in Amakubo 3-3-5 (across from Tsukuba Univ.) offers a 10:30-noon Chinese (Mandarin) service interpreted into both English and Japanese. There is also an English language Bible study every Sunday evening at 7 pm. For information, call Rev. Huang at 52-6820.
The International Christian Assembly meets every Sunday at their new building in Furuku just off of Tsuchiura-Gakuen Sen east of Tsukuba from 10 for Bible Study and 10:30 for worship. For more information, call Richard Swan at 36-0993.
The Nozomi Evangelical Lutheran Church in Tsuchiura (23-27 Komatsu 3-chome) also offers programs in English, including a worship service Saturday evenings at 7:30 pm and a Bible class on Sunday mornings at 9:30. English Bible information courses are available any time. For more information, call Glen Hieb at 0298-21-3578.
The Tsuchiura Christian Church offers an English message translated into Japanese every Sunday morning at 10:30 am. For information, contact Paul Axton at 56-2167.
The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints Tsukuba ward is located at Higashi 2-21-22 by Higashi Middle School between Doho Park and Tsuchiura Noda Sen. Services are translated into English over headphones. The Sacrament Meeting begins at 10 am followed by Sunday School at 11:10 and Priesthood and Relief Society at 12:00. A Gospel Doctrine class in English is also offered. For more information, contact 52-6548.
The Jewish Community of Japan, invites anyone of the Jewish faith in the Tsukuba area to feel welcome at any of their programs in Tokyo. Sabbath services each Friday at 6:30 pm followed by Sabbath dinner; Kosher Kitchen, Saturday morning, 9:30 am. Contact 3-8-8 Hiroo, Shibuya-Ku, Tokyo 150; tel. 03-3400-2559, fax. 03-3400-1827.
1993 Nissan March, 2-door hatchback in excellent condition. Only 28,000 km. Shaken until Oct. 2000. Automatic windows, door locks, etc. A/C, stereo, airbags and the works. Paid Y630,000 for it one year ago. Make me an offer. Clay at 52-1454.
TSUKUBA WOMEN'S UNIVERSITY INTERNATIONAL FILM FESTIVAL:
Academic Year 1999-2000
OVERVIEW: This festival presents many films rarely shown outside of the countries in which they were made. While some are mainstream, most are alternative films. The main purpose of this festival is to introduce rarely shown classic movies.
VENUE: Tsukuba Women's University (Auditorium) Azuma 3-1, Tsukuba-shi
TIME: 6:30-8:30 (note that some films run longer than others)
COST: No charge for any of the films INQUIRIES: (0298)58-4813 (Japanese); (0298)58-6337 (English); juppe@in.kasei.ac.jp
Note that seating is limited to 500.
SCHEDULED FILMS
November 11 Ballad of a Soldier (Soviet Union, 1959)
November 18 A Girl in Black (Greece, 1956)
November 25 Dragon Chow (Germany, 1988)
December 2 Night is My Future (Sweden, 1947)
December 9 A Summer to Remember (Soviet Union, 1960)
December 16 Manufacturing Consent: Noam Chomsky and the Media
(Canada, 1993) (NOTE: Subtitled in Japanese)
January 13 Grand Illusion (France, 1937)
January 20 Mere Jeevan Saathi (India, 1965)
January 27 Mexican Bus Ride (Mexico, 1951)
February 3 Cold Days (Hungary, 1966)
February 10 Shadows of Forgotten Ancestors (Ukraine, 1964)
February 17 Time for Revenge (Argentina, 1983)
February 24 Black Orpheus (Brazil, 1958)
All films are in the original language with English subtitles.
Dear Tech Support:
Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 and noticed that the new program began unexpected child processing that took up a lot of space and valuable resources. No mention of this phenomenon was included in the product brochure. In addition, Wife 1.0 interferes with all other programs and launches unexpectedly during system initialization, where it monitors all system activity.
Applications such as Poker night 4.3, Drunken Boys Night 2.5 and Saturday Football 5.0 no longer run, crashing the system whenever selected.
I cannot seem to minimize Wife 1.0 and keep it in the background while attempting to run some of my other favorite applications. I am thinking about going back to Girlfriend 7.0, but the uninstall seems risky with this program.
Can you help me, please!!!
Thanks, Joe
Dear Joe:
This is a very common problem men complain about but is mostly due to a primary misconception. Many people upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 with the idea that Wife 1.0 is merely a "UTILITIES & ENTERTAINMENT" program.
Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM and designed by its creator to run everything. It is unlikely you would be able to purge Wife 1.0 and stili convert back to Girlfriend 7.0. Hidden operating files within your system would cause Girlfriend 7.0 to emulate Wife 1.0, so nothing is gained.
It is impossible to uninstall, delete, or purge the program files from the system once installed. You cannot go back to Girlfriend 7.0 because Wife 1.0 is not designed to do this.
Some have tried to install Girlfriend 8.0 or Wife 2.0 but end up with more problems than the original system. Look in your manual under "Warnings - Alimony/Child Support." I recommend you keep Wife 1.0 and just deal with the situation. Having Wife 1.0 installed myself, I might also suggest you read the entire section regarding General Partnership Faults (GPFS). You must assume all responsibility for faults and problems that might occur, regardless of their cause. The best course of action will be to enter the command: C:/APOLOGIZE.
In any case avoid excessive use of the "Esc" key because ultimately you will have to execute the APOLOGIZE command anyway before the operating system will return to normal. The system will run smoothly as long as you take the blame for all the GPFs. Wife 1.0 is a great program, but can, in some cases, be high maintenance.
Additional software designed to improve the performance of Wife 1.0 is available in some stores. l recommend Flowers 2.1, Chocolates 5.0., Jewelry 4.0, or Romantic Weekend 1.0.
ShortSkirtSecretary 3.3, at first glance, looks like a good supplement to Wife 1.0, but it is NOT compatible with Wife 1.0 and has, in every case that it has been tried, caused irreversible damage to the operating system. In addition, ShortSkirtSecretary 3.3 is considerably more expensive than the price on the box would indicate.
Many people find that over time, if you just stick with Wife 1.0 and work through the glitches, there is no other package that compares.
Best of luck,
Tech Support